Meri Awaaz hi Pehchaan hai

As Trishanku NRIs like me struggle for their identities in their chosen heaven, few things anchor them firmly to the ground. Lata Mangeshkar and her immortal songs were one of my anchors. And perhaps for many others like me.

Lata Didi kept me company all throughout my stay in the US - in my first stint when I was alone and also later when I was with my wife. In my first trip to the US, I carried a bunch of tapes - anachronistic even in 1999 for the US, and one CD - a collection of Jaidev songs. In my corporate apartment on Broad street in Manhattan, a CD Player was part of the furnishings. I heard the Jaidev CD over and over again, specially Lata's gem - 'Jiya lage na'. In the lonely depressing winter, in a totally unfamiliar country, till the time I made friends, Lata didi was a familiar and friendly voice to keep company!
In my second trip, my wife was with me and we did several roadtrips mostly on the East coast. While we carried all types of music, new and old, INdian and western, we could never think of omitting Lata Mangeshkar collection. Listening to her songs on I-95 or I-80 seemed so out of place and often made me wonder - would she even know that at that particular moment, her voice is being heard and admired in places far away from India! The oft-used adjectives timeless, omnipresent, and immortal stopped being just cliches and seemed so appropriate.

Both of us like songs composed by Madan Mohan and sung by Lata. Fall colors in Vermont and New Hampshire really became mystic with Lata crooning 'Betaab Dil ki tamanna yehi hai' or the more recent 'Khamoshiyan gungunane lagi. One particular late evening in the Adirondacks was accompanied by thunder, lightening, and became poignant listening to 'Tum jo mil gaye ho'. Even an 'Allah Tero Naam' which I normally find boring provided comfort durng the long return drives back from Canada. For the lighter moments, there were Dil To Pagal hai , DDLJ and the duets with Rafi and Kishore. 
Not only did we play Lata's songs on CDs but also could listen to her the Indian radio stations in NJ/NY! The local 'desi' anchors played even Lata's old songs with the same enthusiasm and informed commentary that one would expect from a last century Vividh Bharti anchor. Speaking of Vividh Bharti - my indoctrination in Hindi film music (before it was called Bollywood) happened at home with the help of Vividh Bharati. That was the only source of music and we devoured every moment of it. We grew up listening to Madhumalati at 11 AM, Chayageet at 10 PM and Bela Ke Phool at 11 PM. Depending on whether I had school in the morning or afternoon, the programs I listened to varied a bit. A few years back, at a party with a bunch of 'Desi' consultants and I-Bankers, I was surprised to find that almost everyone recalled these Vividh Bharati programs and their timings. Clearly for them, these were cherished moments from their formative years that will stay with them till the end - no matter where they reside or how much they change.
In the US, one heard Lata Didi unexpectedly too! Like the one wintry evening when walking back from Battery Park to World Trade center, I heard 'Yeh Raat Bhigi Bhigi' being played loudly near the corner of Church Street and Liberty Street. The corner Newspaper booth was taken by an Indian immigrant who proudly and loudly played old Hindi music on his shortwave radio. He did it every evening after that and I made it a point to pass by when I could, but never spoke with him for not wanting to spoil my serendipitous discovery.

As Lata Didi celebrates her 80th birthday and enters the 81st, I have mixed feelings. Regret - for not having born during the glorious 50s and 60s or heard Lata Didi live. Frustration - that my hand crafted speakers and precision amplifiers cannot change the quality of recordings from the Golden Era. Gratitude - for the lady who made lives bearable for the millions in India and gave immense joy to music afficianados. Thankfulness - for having kept me company all over the world.

And also envy - yes envy! How apt for Lata Didi to have sung the 'Naam Gum Jayega, Chehra ye Badal Jayega, Meri Awaaz hi Pehchaan Hai, gar Yaad Rahe'. If anyone can claim it -it's Lata. How fortunate to have such a strong and ever lasting identity! One that can be expressed with such clarity and confidence!

I, the Trishanku NRI, can only hope to one day have a little bit of clarity while defining my identity - not to the world at large but to myself!  I do envy you Lata Didi - for you are not a Trishanku, you found both heaven and earth in one place - in your music!

AJ